Sometimes, it becomes difficult to gather up all the emotions and thoughts into one basic strategy. It happens, often due to some factors like the state of 'dilemma' or approval/disapproval of actions and results. Another main reason is, people. They make us feel tarnished, hence we patch up the holes and don't raise the siren of 'help' or sharing thoughts. The main perspective after all this, is to find peace in something, and we get that by involving ourselves in dispatched imaginations, music and some other stuff which do not allow our mind to know of our existence. It's helpful, but also harmful. If you can't express your inner thoughts to anyone, then you will not be able to go much far away with that, you'll have to release the weight, otherwise you'll always feel like a lifeless, useless, and heavy person by heart and conditions. Many people who weren't able to express themselves commit suicide, and some do become a singer, writer, poet or lecturer. When you can't explain yourself or can't share with someone, then the most easy way to open up is to share it with public!